This week holds two special days for me; one is the anniversary of my marriage, which symbolizes a beautiful beginning and the other is the anniversary of the death of my mother which epitomizes an agonizing final chapter in the book of my life.
Since 1996, I have endeavored to honor both dates with all of the respect and enthusiasm I could muster. The first few years after mom died, it was especially difficult to enjoy my anniversary. There was that “other” day coming on its heels, the one where the sky always looks the same as it did on that fateful day and details that would be better off forgotten gallop through my thoughts.
As I have grown older and realize the brevity of life and the importance of enjoying it, I often think of how my mom embraced life.
She was a dreamer, a romantic, intelligent and funny. She lived through some tough things; she lost her mom, her dad, her grandmother and a brother. She went through a heart-wrenching divorce.
However, if you were to inquire of anyone in my family as to who absolutely lit up a room when they entered; they would tell you quickly that it was my mother. She is often remembered for her smile, even when in the midst of adversity.
I will never forget the first time she met my husband and how much she adored him. She said, ‘he’s a keeper”. I reminisce on the first (sometimes bumpy) years of marriage when I dialed her number seeking solace and more importantly someone willing to blindly take my side. Although I’m still not sure exactly how she pulled it off, my outlook was often altered by the time I hung up the phone. She would cause me to look inward, and sometimes identify (much to my chagrin!) when I was the problem.
So, in a strange, somewhat enchanted way, the two days are combined into the fond memories of my mother, the wonderful times we had together; and the beautiful memories of my marriage and the hopes and dreams of many years to come.
There is also the knowledge that she would want me to give my anniversary the recognition it deserves and celebrate it to the fullest. She would flash that big ole’ smile and give us her blessings all over again if she could.
Once again, my memories, which threatened to take on a life of melancholy this afternoon, have only catapulted me to a happiness that comes from knowing that I have been and continue to be loved and nurtured by some of the best! I’m sitting here with your smile, mom and happy tears.
Long walks and dark chocolate 
This is beautiful. It perfectly captures the love of Life that it sounds as if your mum emanated!
A wonderful piece to read. Happy anniversary! And smiles to you on the day you need them the most.
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment and I’m honored that you enjoyed! Writing makes me feel so much better, so it’s an added bonus if someone actually likes it…thanks for the smiles 🙂
I think this would be a great time to do a photo shoot!! We can incorporate your anniversary & objects that symbolize your mother : )
Sounds like a cool idea, Katie – I’ll touch base with you on it after I’ve given it more thought ❤
What a wonderful post dear. As you know, I can relate to the loss of your Mom. You are an excellent example of continuing to enjoy life and carrying on her legacy! Happy Anniversary!
Thank you so much, Patty!
You hit the nail on the head. I am sure she is smilling down on you both. Oh by the way happy anniversary.
Thanks and thank you for taking the time to read – love and miss you both!!
lisa your mom was a very beautiful lady, inside and out, I know when God opens up the windows of heaven she smiles down, with much pride as to who you and Deanna have become. Just like her beautiful, inside and out.praying for you and your family
Thank you!!
My mother died suddenly over 30 years ago while I was expecting my second daughter. A daughter who never met the grandmother she resembles in talent and features chose the perfect gift to give me. She chose to be married on the anniversary of her grandmothers death as a means of recognizing and celebrating the continuity of life.
That’s very sweet and I will also share that when my mom died, I was 8 mos pregnant with our youngest, Morgan. And, we have another similarity in that we got married on my husbands brother birthday. He lost his brother years ago and it was our way of honoring him….so yes, lots of special meaning entwined with this days. Thanks for commenting and sharing your story!
That was really beautiful Lisa. Hope you & Derrick have a wonderful anniversary weekend. We love you both! Aunt Alice & Uncle Dennis
Thanks, love you too!!
From this story, your mother was a very beautiful woman with such great love for her family. You are blessed to have been given a mother like her. May you always have joy in your heart carrying her memories with you wherever you go.
Thank you so much, she really was an amazing woman; we were truly blessed!
Reblogged this on Long walks and dark chocolate and commented:
And another re-post in celebration of my beautiful mother who left this life for a better one 20 years ago today.
My Nana, who was like a mother to me died on my birthday. I always called her on Sunday and that year I decided to wait until Monday (my bday that year), I know she’d want to speak with me on my birthday – and she *hated all the numbers she had to dial, prefered I called her. She passed before 7am never hearing from me and without hearing “Happy Birthday Laurie, did you get my card?” ♥ I learned to remind myself of how much she loved me (she was the person who always made a big deal out of my birthday!) and would want me to be happy. I kind of 1/2 joke that she chose my birthday because she wanted to be sure I would never forget her (like that could ever happen). – Thank you for your post. Touched my heart.
Blessings, Laurie
Thanks, Laurie and blessings to you too!