Me and my Celica

Remember the year I turned sixteen?  Must I?  What a tumultuous year, a year filled with ups and downs, highs and lows, a veritable roller coaster.

Looking back, meandering down that passionate, tormenting, and at times exciting path makes me smile now.  That is, after I reassure my racing heart that those days are over and we have lived and learned plenty since then.

To highlight the good first, I got a brand new car; a Toyota Celica with a moon roof.  My dad put money down and I made the payments working at my part time bank job.

Dancing was one of my favorite past times and that year and much of my solace came from lessons at Miss Debbie’s School of Dance.  I could work out the frustrations and stress of being a teenage girl through jazz, tap and ballet.  My introversion which I mistook for shyness back then disappeared when performing in a recital.

I suffered what I thought was my biggest heartbreak ever that year and went on to begin a new relationship which would deliver an even bigger one.

Seriously, I must add that this year was a defining one for me and not in a good way.  I lost myself in a young man and gave up on my hopes and dreams and settled for what I had somehow began to believe was all I deserved, much to my wonderful mother’s chagrin.  I won’t elaborate on all the whys and what could have beens, because I believe in the end, I learned a lot and some of that made me who I am today.

There is no reasonable explanation for why I made some of the choices that I made, but thankfully, God is merciful.  Although, I suffered plenty at the hands of love, I made it through that fire intact, albeit singed and in need of tender loving care.

I think sweet sixteen is an oxymoron, and I know many who would readily agree with my assessment.  As for me, I’m much happier now as a forty-something, confident, life loving, secure, blessed and highly favored, woman of God.