The more candles, the brighter the shine

Happy Birthday to me

My 47th birthday

The Prompt:  Do you enjoy growing old or do you fight against it?

Do I enjoy growing old or do I fight against it?   I suppose I could quote some old adage, like, “You’re only as old as you feel” or “Old age isn’t so bad when you consider the alternative.”   To be perfectly honest though, I would have to say both.  I am enjoying myself but I wouldn’t hesitate in some regards to slow it down.

As I approach 50, what Victor Hugo referred to as the “youth of old age”, I think one of the best things about aging is that I am finally comfortable with who I am.  I know precisely what I want, and what I will and will not tolerate.  There is something liberating in being able to be unapologetically yourself.  Gone are the days of trying to impress and worrying so much about what others think.

There are silly inconsequential things that give me great pleasure, like having finally discovered exactly how I like certain things, like my tea or toast and not settling for anything else.   I have embraced the fact that I am a home body and that I relish times of solitude.  No longer do I strive to change things about myself that are an inherent part of my makeup.

For me, growing older is a time of much greater faith, considerable confidence and thankfully more wisdom.  I say thankfully, because I have noticed that age does not always guarantee wisdom.  You have to have been willing to learn and grow from life’s experiences, you must implement change and hearken to the voice of reason.

As much as I am comfortable in my own skin, (except for the occasional hot flash) I would be lying if I said I didn’t have some degree of vanity over preserving it, for as long as possible.  I probably spend too much on moisturizers and my trip to the salon to cover the grey isn’t something I plan on giving up anytime soon.  I try to exercise daily, which has been impeded as of late due to a heel spur, which is causing knee pain as I favor the foot.  I could elaborate on recent ailments that I am assured are a part of life now and to be expected.  I will war against them with tenacity.

I suppose we could conclude that I love the inner workings of getting older but I am battling the outward manifestations.

I want to receive growing older as a gift, not a burden or something to be feared.  I plan to make the approach to 50 gracefully; eyes wide open in wonder as I head over that hill.

Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day.  2 Corinthians 4:16

Related post:  To 50 and beyond!

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