They hurt, so we love

Teardrop on Fire

Teardrop on Fire (Photo credit: tj.blackwell)

Why can’t we see that people are hurting?  Why do some people rush to spread bad news, but don’t bother to take the time to clear up a nasty rumor?

We are all touched by pain, turmoil and tragedy, are we not?  We all suffer so how do we forget what that feels like.  How do we forget what would have made us feel better and then not offer that instead of judgment and gossip?

Please know that I am searching my own heart as I share.  I hate gossip and try to stay far from it, but don’t we all get roped in sometimes?  Aren’t we also partakers even if we just listen?  Isn’t that just as bad?  And how does that help, what does it accomplish?

When I think on the times that I have felt ravished and torn by life’s trials and troubles, I quickly remember the friends who showed up, who covered me in prayer; the ones who stood up for me and my family.  I think of those who quickly discerned that it wasn’t a time for observation and speculation, but a time to show love and concern.  They realized that it was a time to love and hold and listen.

I have been studying the book of Job, and just like everything else God does, this was divine timing, because it has been helpful to apply some of what I have learned to hurting people.  It is teaching me to be a better friend.  One who understands that there is a big picture and I can’t figure it all out and I don’t have all the answers.  Sometimes the most helpful thing I can do is to pray for them and listen.  Notice I said “listen”, not always speaking, not always thinking I have all the answers.

Most of us, by the time we have reached my age, have experienced the death of a loved one, severe illness in ourselves or others, financial difficulty or even ruin, marital discord and sometimes divorce, problems with children and grandchildren, and the list goes on and on.

God help us to remember some of those times; the way we felt, the people who cared and the things that counted.  What made us feel better, what caused a smile to tug at the corners of our mouth and what made us feel loved and warm inside?  May we remember and pay it forward.

Slow down

Clock

Clock (Photo credit: Dalo_Pix2)

So what if the beans don’t get done and the blog doesn’t get written.  This is what I told myself in the shower, although I didn’t really believe myself.  I thought I had to be somewhere early tonight and I was in a rush.  You know the feeling, when you feel your blood pressure rising a bit because you are frantically trying to figure out how to get an hour’s worth of tasks done in 20 minutes.

You work until whatever time and then you have a list of things to do (have you noticed this list never goes away, it just changes).  The way I plan things, if all goes according to plan, everything usually goes pretty favorably.  But, let something or someone throw a wrench in my plan it can go from smooth sailing to a tropical disturbance fairly quickly.  It’s my own fault because I don’t tend to leave much wiggle room in my plan; something I need to work on.

Have you ever blow dried your hair, while putting on lipstick and picking up a stray sock with your toes to sling it in the laundry basket?  Yeah, that’s how I roll.   How about brushing your teeth while throwing in a load of laundry or knowing exactly how much time you have to do simple chores in the morning while waiting for computer to boot up, or talking on the phone while doing dishes or cleaning the shower while you are taking your shower?  Nifty little multi-tasking, time savers but are they really necessary?

The thing is, there are not many things in my life that are truly so important that they are worthy of so much stress and rushing.  It’s not like I’m up against a multi-million dollar deadline or that anyone will be largely impacted by my being a few minutes late.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to plan ahead and have some goals and be on time.  However, if something doesn’t get done, what will the outcome really be?  How important is it?  Things to think about.

So while I was ironing my shirt (because you always find something you want to wear that needs to be ironed if you’re in a hurry), the phone rang.   I answered and continued to iron (no sense in wasting time) and the call was to inform me that I no longer had to be somewhere early.  See, all of that anxiety was for naught.  So, here I sit, hot tea in hand, comfortably and leisurely writing my blog.

Have a blessed, stress-free night!

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