Inspirational – Long walks and dark chocolate

Weekly Photo Challenge: Juxtapostion

January 25, 2014 3 Comments

A juxtaposition is “the act of placing things side by side, especially for the purpose of comparison or contrast”

Sweet and Sour

This challenge reminded me of a frequent occurrence during a particular period of time when I was young. Some afternoons, my dad liked to “take a ride” with the family in his pickup truck down one of the dirt roads. Before we embarked on our adventure, we often stopped at Mrs. Watson’s store for snacks. We could each pick one candy item and I remember how mom would always tell us we were silly if we picked anything other than chocolate. She would say, “Eww, you picked that old sour stuff”. On the occasions where she got something too, she invariably picked chocolate. When we got into the truck with our Sweet Tarts, Razzles, Lemon Heads, and Now and Laters, she teasingly declared their inferiority beside the long adored chocolate.

As I opened the bag of chewy sweet tarts and popped two, one yellow and one purple, in my mouth I immediately grimaced as the sour registered on my tongue. I began to parallel the sweetness and the sour to our lives and the way we sometimes pick the sour over the sweetness. When life delivers the inevitable discomfort of a “sour” scenario, we have choices. We can suck on that for a while, even though it makes us wince, until we ultimately find ourselves enjoying it, relishing in the bitterness. Bitterness, hatred and unforgiveness are like a slow growing disease that saps all of our joy and strength.

We can also choose to lift our chin up, forgive quickly, learn whatever God would teach us from the situation and move on. And as I read the other day from a devotional, “feelings should be indicators, not dictators”. In the end, it’s your choice, but if you would rather be happy and bring joy to others, pick the sweet!

Filed Under: Inspirational, Photography Tagged With: candy, dark chocolate, sweet and sour, sweet tarts, weekly photo challenge

Just pick one

January 11, 2014 2 Comments

I just walked in the door from a nice long, gorgeous walk.

This morning, I found myself mulling over one thing after the other that I wanted to get accomplished today. Knowing that my almost daily walks help me to clear my head and listen for God’s will in the foggy areas, I decided it was time to change clothes, lace up and get out.

If you read my post from a couple of days ago, The Everyday Things, you will know that earlier in the week I received a poignant reminder to slow down. That continues to resonate in my soul.

It is easy to imagine that the faster we go, the more things we check off that list (you know, the one that never has an ending and is never going to?), the better our lives will be. So, the outcome from that type of thinking is we hurry to do more. Wouldn’t you agree? However, do we do it as well? Do we focus all of our energy and attention in to one thing and give it our best?

Let me illustrate. Say, for example, that I feel led to go and visit some of the elderly folks in my community, just to check in and let them know they are loved and appreciated. If I do something akin to a drive-by, pop in, hello, pop out, goodbye, it’s better than not having done anything. But, what if I really focus on that person for say, an hour? What if I look into their eyes, sincerely desirous to see and know their heartfelt needs? I’m taking the time to discover how I might be of the most help to them, and at the same time, letting them know I really do care about them.

We don’t want to do things just so we can say “I did something”, or feel like I we checked an item off the list, or just “did my good deed for the day”. The second example involves more sacrifice; it’s more of a heart thing.

Today, as I put one of my new Christmas sneakers in front of the other, I contemplated on this and I knew that I needed to “pick one”. Pick one thing today, pour myself out and into it. If there is time left, move on to another, but not at the expense of the first. This is difficult, especially for women who are so adept at multi-tasking. That’s a great talent to have in many areas of our lives, but not when it comes to relationships with other human beings. I continue to pray that I will learn this, let it sink in and make it a habit of my own.

May we all continue to slow down, really listen and love deeply.

Filed Under: Family and Home, Inspirational Tagged With: advice, compassionate, hurry, kindness, long walks, love, rushing, slow-down

The Everyday Things

January 9, 2014 5 Comments

This morning the routine I followed was the normal one. I was logged into my computer and plugging away by 6:00am. Knowing that I am the most productive in the morning, I try to make the most of my “prime” hours. Phones, emails and IMs are usually pretty quiet until around 7:00am so I was surprised when at 6:26, I saw an IM blinking at the bottom of my screen.

Quickly, I opened it to scan the contents and smiled to see it was a nice guy from up north and the question he posed was relatively easy, so it shouldn’t take much time. I hurriedly typed out my response, scanned for typos and hit “send”. I was done and could now move on to another task.

He thanked me, and then he said something that would change my morning. He said, “by the way, Lisa, how are you? Sometimes I ask a lot of questions and forget to ask the really important one, of how one is doing.”

Suddenly it occurred to me that I’ve known this man for many years and had no idea how he was doing either. As usual, I hadn’t taken the time to stop and ask. Why are we often too busy to be polite?

This man had (probably unknowingly) just preached an entire message that went straight to my heart and exposed, once again, the selfishness and “much too busy” attitudes lodged there.

So, I replied, “I understand what you are saying; we all get too busy to slow down and really care, don’t we? How have YOU been?

He began to tell me that 2013 had been a tough year for him and he was glad to see it go. He had lost his mother in law to cancer, and while he and his wife were cleaning up her estate, his wife of 37 years fell ill and was diagnosed with Stage 4 breast cancer. He lost her in August.

Wow! I hadn’t known and my heart ached for the grief and pain that must still resonate within him. With the tears that now filled my eyes making the screen almost too blurry to see, I did my best to convey my heartfelt sympathy and congratulated him on such a long-lasting marriage. He advised me to cherish every moment of mine and I told him I would heed his advice and take it to heart and we said our goodbyes.

Only a few moments had passed, but I looked at the day ahead with a fresh perspective. I wonder if he even had a clue how his words affected me today or how grateful to him I am.

Everyone is going through things and I want to know, I want to care and I want to bring comfort when I can.

Look someone in the eyes and ask them how they are today or tomorrow, and then give them time to respond. If and when someone asks you the same, give them the benefit of an honest answer. You might give them the opportunity to comfort you. We all are blessed when we give or receive.

And, always look for the lesson or the reminder in the everyday things.

Filed Under: Family and Home, Inspirational Tagged With: death, helping hand, kindness, love, loved ones, sympathy, tenderness, too busy

Glimmer, don’t Gripe

December 19, 2013 5 Comments

christmas lights (Photo credit: harold.lloyd)

While we dream of a White Christmas, children in a dusty street dream of shoes to wear

While we stuff the turkey and then our bellies, many are digging through garbage for dinner

While we share enchanted kisses under the mistletoe, someone somewhere is suffering violence at the hands of a loved one

As we carefully wrap gifts in shiny paper a laid off dad unwraps an envelope containing a bill he can’t pay

As we go caroling and attend plays and parties, the old man down the street cries tears of loneliness, feeling abandoned

While we fill our spare bedrooms and pull out couches with family and friends, a single mom and her children sleep in the street

And as we deck the halls and our homes with sparkling lights, many are searching for just a glimmer of hope

I write all this, not to upset anyone, or make anyone feel guilty for enjoying your Christmas and family. ENJOY your family, really take the time to enjoy each and every one of them! Look into their eyes when they are speaking, pay attention and show your love abundantly. If you are among the blessed, be thankful for your blessings and don’t you dare complain!

Be the glimmer of hope for someone, whether you think they deserve your attention or not. After all, when we think about the true meaning of Christmas, isn’t it about a gift of love we didn’t deserve? Don’t let anyone on your street be hungry, hopeless or lonely this Christmas season. If we all do that, think of what we would accomplish!

Filed Under: Family and Home, Inspirational Tagged With: Christmas, Christmas lights, Holiday, Religious, True meaning of Christmas

Christmas threads

December 7, 2013 6 Comments

“Ma’am, may I ask you a question?” The persistent young lady clutching a tube of sea salt, something or other, actually matched my steps for a few seconds as I hurried past the mid-mall vendor. After my “no thank you” didn’t faze her tenacity, I tried “No thank, you I’m not interested” in a more serious tone. When that also failed to weaken her resolve, I decided to just pick up my pace and ignore her. She was intent on making a sale but I was determined to escape.

Moments later, I settled into a seat with my lunch to take a break and re-group. I found myself feeling angry. Why should my leisurely trip to the mall be interrupted by an incident that left me feeling like I’d done something wrong? I don’t like to use my firm tone of voice and I certainly don’t like to ignore people. My day begins with a prayer to show love to others, not return rudeness.

Determined not to lose my joy, I let it go, adamant in my desire to shine a little brighter for the remainder of my day.

I begin to recall memories of Christmas shopping in this very mall with my mom, my husband, my mother in law, my girls and many friends. Some of them are no longer here, but I can meander through the memories and find the moments and share them again.

The heart of Christmas for me lies in my Christian roots; the reality of the gift given to the entire world on that Christmas long ago. When we celebrate Christmas, it’s based on that love and although December can be hurried and harried, that is where the focus must remain.

As I began to look around a few stops later, I noticed the exuberant face of a little boy as he carefully selected ornaments with his mother. She spoke softly to him, love and tenderness in her voice. They were both young and creating “moments” together to be cherished for years to come.

I rounded the aisle and saw what appeared to be a family, according to their similarities in look. There was an elderly woman in a wheelchair, being pushed by a younger woman, who could have been her daughter. I paused to let them pass and they smiled in thanks. Directly in pursuit of them was a younger woman, who was very noticeably pregnant. I wondered if I was perhaps looking at four generations (one still in the oven). They made me smile as they laughed and joked about who was “bringing up the rear”, obviously enjoying each other immensely.

We have to remember during all the hustle and bustle of the season to cherish one another and to savor moments and make memories. Every moment, every event, be it large or small is like a thread, which when woven together with love, create a beautiful garment of memories, that can be thrown around our shoulders to embrace and comfort us time and time again.

And that reminds me of the comforting love of the Father – Have a blessed day and cherish those moments!

Christmas IS in the Air (silviayg.wordpress.com)
Fa-la-la-la-lineman’s first family Christmas… (thelovelylittlelinewife.com)
The Weekend Dish-Christmas Quiz (backyardsisters.com)

Filed Under: Family and Home, Inspirational Tagged With: Christian, Christmas, Christmas tree, Decorations, Family, Holidays, love, memories, moments, Opinions, Shopping

Morning dew and joy

October 12, 2013 6 Comments

rain drops on hisbicus

The only light she saw was the blue dot on the DVR player and a soft glow from the computer screen. At 2:00am, it was dreadfully dark and silent except for the sound of the ceiling fan as it followed its infinite circular route.

It was time; time for prayer and quiet reflection, time to stop suppressing the angst and the pain; time to release the fear and let it all tumble out in salty cleansing tears.

She doesn’t like to cry, especially not this kind of cry; the heart-wrenching sobs that had threatened like a black and dreaded storm cloud for days now. She likes to show herself strong, capable, and unmoved by life’s jabs and pokes and knockouts.

But deep within, she knows that to give up on self, to let go and let God is the answer. That is when the healing can begin and joy will return. Not the “ha-ha” playground laughter kind of joy, but the deep-down to your soul kind. On her knees, pouring it out in sobs that are interrupted by deep gasping breaths, she lets God right things.

Then, peace ensues and a heart at rest can finally rest. The mind stops racing, and the once elusive sleep comes quickly.

Morning breaks with a sunrise of hope and goals and motivation afresh! Yes, joy does come in the morning.

Filed Under: Inspirational Tagged With: empty nest, faith, God, healing, Health, joy, peace, Prayer, tears of joy

The little foxes

September 15, 2013 1 Comment

English: Common foxes in the snow. Français : Renards roux dans la neige. W.Kuhnert. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Mom used to repeat that long-ago penned slice of wisdom originating from The Song of Solomon; “It’s the little foxes that spoil the vines”. In my younger days, when I had never yet set my gaze on a real live fox much less these vineyards he desired to spoil, it didn’t make much sense to me. A lot of things didn’t then.

But, oh have I found that saying to be accurate and worth adding to my arsenal of proven truths.

We expect trials and tribulations to manifest in some big, easily recognizable way. We presume that when we enter throes of temptation, we will always show up, eyes wide open, prepared and completely alert.

However, it starts with the little things…

That one phrase spoken in a sugar sweet voice, laced with black, dark, hate.

That tiny wound that rages red, becoming infected with revenge.

That look of contempt, the kind where a disgusted shaking head follows.

Sometimes it starts as a barely noticeable disengaging from life, a slow giving in to despair.

A pinch of jealousy, fertilized with just the right mix of self-loathing and insecurity can turn into an ugly beast, hard to control.

One small plank thrown up to shelter a tender heart can turn into a fortress.

Yes, I am confident that a lot of the “little things” become very big things if we don’t catch them and deal with them immediately.

The little foxes do spoil the vines, but only, if we let them.

Filed Under: Inspirational Tagged With: Fox, heart, little foxes, problems, song, Song of Solomon, the little things, unforgiveness, Vine, vines

Daily Prompt: Regrets, I’ve had a few

September 6, 2013 5 Comments

What’s your biggest regret? How would your life have been different if you’d made another decision?

This prompt spoke to me in a big way this morning, causing me to reflect on my life thus far. I can’t say that I have one regret in particular and since I believe all things happen for a reason, I believe I am exactly where I am supposed to be today.

With that said, I have many regrets:

• The times I withheld forgiveness instead of forgiving freely and quickly and completely.
• The times I chose to clean house instead of making mud pies.
• Every minute I spent in the mirror criticizing my appearance, and especially the times in front of my girls.
• For the careless word spoken that wounded, sometimes deeply.
• The conversations I merely endured that should have been feasted upon.
• The years I spent running from God.
• The “I love you” left unspoken and the phone calls never made.
• Every hour wasted on hatred, jealousy, anger and strife.

And finally, the time I have spent dwelling on past regrets instead of choosing to leap past them, learn from them and strive to live out the remainder of this life with fewer of them.

This was a great writing prompt and it’s good to force yourself to think back sometimes and glean from past mistakes, to remember where you came from and who you have become. Of most importance though is to move forward and live this beautiful life out loud, with great expectations, faith and hope. May we all fully implement the lessons learned that they never influence our lives negatively again.

Filed Under: Family and Home, Inspirational, Photography Tagged With: Bible, children, Christianity, God, motherhood, regret, Religion and Spirituality, Sin

It’s a bad day, not a bad life

August 8, 2013 5 Comments

The alarm woke me up angrily as if to say there is no time to spare, not another blink of sleep is to occur on my watch! The door reached out to clobber me in the side of my head as I dragged a less than cooperative body to the bathroom. The water was cold as it bitterly splashed my awakening skin, and my eyes simply refused to focus properly; then the scale was particularly hateful.

Off to the kitchen where the red light on my keurig flashed impatiently, shouting, “refresh me or else”!

Finally seated in front of my computer, I attempted to begin my work day. Of course on days like this, fingers fail to move where your mind tells them to go and logins are incorrect.

It was as if my blood pressure was rising while my patience was waning and it wasn’t yet 6:00am.

As the day schlepped on, ever so slowly, it was one irritating thing after another. There was the way my bank (for reasons still unclear to me) locked out my online banking feature, and the only way that I could prove that I truly was who I proclaimed to be was by me knowing the amount and date of my very last transaction.

This may seem a walk in the park to you, but since I was dealing with my hubby’s business account, I knew my getting this right was as likely as him remembering to tell me he even used the card; therefore, highly unlikely. I was so amazed when the last receipt he had thrown in a crumpled up pile on the counter actually matched. I could have cried tears of joy! Yes! I had received my first miracle of the day.

Even after this turn of events, my mood continued to darken and my appetite threatened to destroy my resolve against all things unhealthy. My husband and daughter felt the tumultuous waves of my hormonal raging. I even had to make one apology…harrumph!

About this time one of my co-workers and I were discussing a timeline for a future fix and something she said shook my resolve to be angry today. I made a negative comment and she said, “hey, you’re always the positive one”. Ouch! God was showing me, crystal clear, that my attitude needed adjusting. But, I didn’t heed at that point; I was too deep in the yuck-mode.

Later, once I got off work and sat basking in the afternoon sun, remembering that today is my Friday, I looked back on today and actually smiled. Okay, I admit it was one of those wimpy, embarrassed smiles, but it was a smile nonetheless.

Somehow, at that point, I quickly repented for my negativity and forced myself to realize (once again) all that I have to be thankful for in life. I heard the words, “it’s a bad day, not a bad life” resonate from somewhere deep within.

Yes, I can blame SOME of it on hormones, but this selfishness, thinking it’s all about me, forgetting the blessings, is something I feel I will be blogging about over and over until I get it. And, then maybe I will continue until others get it as well. If you’ve had a bad day, get alone somewhere quiet, say a prayer, read a verse, breath in and out and begin to count those blessings. It will do you good!

Filed Under: Inspirational Tagged With: almost 50, Banking Services, be positive, counting blessings, Friday, God, hormonal issues, I'm sorry, menopause, moodiness, Online banking, selfishness, thankfulness, workday

Shuffling a little slower now

August 3, 2013 11 Comments

-Elderly couple comfort each other (Photo credit: Gordon T Lawson)

They walked out of CVS together, cars impatiently waiting for them to make their way slowly through the crosswalk. I watched the struggle with empathy, silently imagining what their long history together might have entailed. They both approached the car and she slowly and carefully got in the passenger side. He opened the driver’s side car door wincing, as if the mere action of pulling it open caused him pain. Then, he took his time to gently fold himself down into the seat. After several minutes, they were on their way.

My eyes see an elderly couple; the lady had white hair and a matching polyester outfit gracing her petite frame, full makeup and glasses and sensible shoes. She had a plastic bag sporting the store logo in her hand and the contents, 2 boxes of frosted flakes,were visible. I smiled. The man was stooped over, bald and moved as though arthritis or some other painful disease was taking its toll on him. I could see the vexation in his eyes as he struggled to do the small tasks that only a few years ago were likely very easy for him.

As they drove away, their mouths moving in conversation, I began to wonder if they felt as old as they looked. I wondered if there are things they can no longer do, and if that frustrates them greatly. I thought about children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren and wondered if they had any of these and if so, did they visit? Were the boxes of frosted flakes for them or their grandchildren? Were their lives happy ones or did they face each day with increasing loneliness or fear at what the future holds?

I remember a time, not long ago in the grand scheme of things, when my first thought may have been that they probably shouldn’t even be driving and I may have been one of those impatient drivers in the crosswalk, rushing about. As I grow older myself, my patience increases and my compassion grows. I am reminded once again, that life is short. We need to live out every moment and love the ones God has placed in our lives, to tell them and to show them each and every day. Life can be stressful and we are all too busy with so many things that don’t really matter. Can we show more respect, love and appreciation to the elderly in our community?

I know how it can feel like there just aren’t enough hours in the day. Sometimes you do make the time to reach out and love. You may call or visit or write, yet, the person on the receiving end doesn’t seem to appreciate it or you feel like it’s never enough.

Whatever the case, do it anyway. Make a day brighter, help quench the pangs of loneliness. For you and I, my friends, will be there soon enough.